What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Randomize
