Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
