oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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