capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
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