just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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