Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
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