Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Randomize
