Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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