You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
