god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
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