I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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