fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
