Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
It's just like the Real World with babies
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
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