evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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