Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize
