dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
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