no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Randomize
