also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Randomize
