I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
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