You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
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