At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Randomize
