I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
