3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
Randomize