Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Randomize
