If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
You've changed since you got that strap on
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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