so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
