he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
