Already got asked if we're dating
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
Randomize
