just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Randomize
