OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
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