They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
