you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize
