We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
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