i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
i wish my penis had a tongue
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
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