belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
Randomize
