We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I just forgot I was standing up.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize
