clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
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