Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
