you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
