In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
Randomize
