I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
