i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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