I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Randomize
