why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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