you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
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