So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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