Don't make out with my wife yet
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
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