let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Randomize