Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Randomize
