Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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